I want a new duck, not a quail or an owl.

You might look at this and say 'lego brick' but in fact it is actually a Costco milk jug. I recently attended the land of the insanity & everything rude, otherwise known as Costco, and remembered my child was out of milk. (or so I thought. Come to find out we had some milk in the fucking fridge but that tidbit has nothing to do with this rant) So I'm like holy shit we need milk and we grab a couple gallons, I would have grabbed one, but you can't cuz they sell em in 2's, what they should do is sell them in 5 gallon jugs but I'll save kerteeking for later.

Anyway, when I purchased this bullshit I didn't really notice that it was shaped like a fucking cardboard box and has virtually nothing for a spout. Holy shit, this bitch is a box with a hole in it! Have you ever tried to pour liquid out of a container that wasn't designed to do so? Yup, that's right, it goes fucking everywhere. So here I am 7am, little toddler wanting nothing more than some mother fucking milk, and I'm raging because Costco decided to reinvent the milk jug. It has a larger than average hole to pour from and I'm trying to get it into a smaller than average lil kids cup! Idiots.

They have to put a disclaimer up in this bitch saying that it isn't intended for use on little kids. Or maybe they should give away a pump like they do with the huge fucking container of chocolate sauce. I'd totally be okay with a pump. Even giant bottles of Jagrmeister come with a fuckign pump. How can you pour booze into a shot glass from a giant bottle. Boom, a pump.

I know I know you sell them like that because they fucking stack but you need to work on the usefulness of that worthless pile of shit. I have no idea what I'm going to do with 1.9 gallons of shittyly contained milk but I do know this....

Stop selling milk all together because you fucking suck at it.